Your Turn Challenge: Day 5
Today I needed to confront someone.
They said something and used words that I found offensive. I felt like they crossed the line. (I'm using "they" as a gender-neutral, singular pronoun on purpose. I realize it breaks grammar rules. Sorry, editor friends. I feel your pain, too).
The thing is, I didn't confront them at first. Not in the moment. That would have been uncomfortable, but also, perhaps, rash and unwise.
Even after, there wasn't a good time to do it.
Later on, I saw them and wanted to say something, but there were other people there. I wanted to talk in private.
I hovered.
I walked around.
I walked away.
I felt like a coward, believing I had a moral obligation to say something, knowing I had the opportunity, but not bringing myself to say it.
It seemed like it needed to have some anger behind it. If I was really offended, I should be willing to make a scene.
After some time, I ended up walking back and stating, calmly, that I wanted to talk later about what happened. I said this in front of other people.
I didn't call them out or make a scene, and this felt weak. It felt like I had taken the easy way out.
Later on we had a great conversation, as I knew we would. It was respectful, yet honest and direct.
It was a very anti-climactic exchange.
I felt disappointed that it took me so long to say something in the first place.
I felt a little disappointed that it wasn't more difficult and uncomfortable and tense when I did.
But maybe it didn't have to be dramatic.
Maybe my biggest confrontation was with my own fears, and what I thought would be a confrontation just needed to be a conversation.
Maybe feeling that a certain way is weak doesn't mean it truly is.
#yourturnchallenge #yourturn #day5
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