Wednesday, September 30, 2015
I just got done painting.
No, not like a Dali or Picasso or Monet. Not that type of painting.
More like brushes, and trays, and buckets, and rollers type of painting.
I still have light mint green paint on my hands. And some on my shoes.
And the one thing I noticed when I started is that I'm really bad at it. I had done it before - in fact, it was in this same house about 10 years ago. But it's been awhile.
I kept thinking, "Man, I have no business doing this."
It felt awkward, and I could see streaks on the walls, and I wasn't sure about what kind of pressure I should use, and the angles were all weird, and I was like "maybe it's all in the wrist" but my wrist isn't used to the whole uppey-downey sideways motions, and it was just, let's say, not feeling natural.
But my brother is painting his house and needed help, so here I am. I'm doing my best. And I feel like I suck at it. But I'm also free labor, so hey.
What I realized at the end of it though is that I was starting to get the hang of it.
I was like, hey, maybe I'm OK at this.
I mean I was not ready to invite my grandpa, a former journeyman painter, to come take a look at it. I can only imagine the tears he would cry after looking at my workmanship.
It's just so so far from what he could do.
But I'm glad I did it. I'm glad I tried again at something I'm bad at.
I feel like I learned something about myself. Discovered a new skill. Pushed myself just a little bit.
And so I say to you- try something you're bad at.
Not like a new hobby or sport or something you eventually want to get good at. Not the first step in a long journey of perfecting a craft. Even though those too start with being terrible and making mistakes.
No, I'm talking about something you're just going to try for an hour. Or a day. And then put it down again.
Relish in what it's like to be out of place. To be a "beginner" but with no hope of being a master.
Like my painting skills. Maybe it will be 10 years before I have to use them again.
But when I do, I'll know that my wrist-rotating uppey-downey zig-zag motion skills are good enough.
And that's good enough.