Thursday, December 24, 2015

#24 - Stuffed Elephants & Why I sit in my car (5/7)

I'm sitting in my car right now. Writing this entry on my phone.

Earlier today, I needed to do some reading, and I ended up bringing it to my car and reading there for about 45 minutes.

It's this odd quirk I have. I've noticed recently how much time I spend in my car. I gravitate toward it.

But what a place to read: there's natural sunlight. A comfortable seat (which reclines). Privacy and security (it locks). No wind or noise. A cupholder.

I think it makes sense.  

And yet I admit it's kind of weird. Why do I do it?

Why do I like sitting in my car so much? 

Then it dawned on me.  

I feel safe here. Comfortable. It's familiar. 

In fact, it may be the only place that has stayed consistent in my life over the last 8.5 years. 

I've moved houses at least 5 times. Rooms. Jobs. Careers. States. At my teaching job I sat in the same chair (essentially) for 5 years. That's changed. I had the same comfortable mattress that I loved for most of that time. Just got rid of that. 

And when I saw it from that perspective, I thought: 

Wow. No wonder. 

It feels safe and familiar. I feel protected, almost like a cave or cocoon. 

So in everything I've gone through this past nearly 10 years, I could always retreat to my car. 

And read.
Listen to music.
Get lost in social media.
Have long text conversations. 
Meditate and breathe. 

And it would feel like home. 

It's been the thread that ties everything together.

It makes me think of material possessions and how silly we humans can get with them. They're just things, after all.

Little kids with their blankeys and stuffed elephants. 

Necklaces and jewelry - maybe a family heirloom.

Teenagers and that hoodie sweatshirt they wear every day of sophomore year. 

But maybe they are more than that. Maybe they represent some thread that connects us to our past, brings us back home. 

What are the threads in your life? What things do you find always by your side? Where are the places you find yourself retreating to? 

I would guess that it's not by accident. 

You might find it interesting to explore these questions. See what turns up. What you find may surprise you. I certainly never thought of my car as that significant. But I guess it is. 

Next time you see someone attached to some object, instead of judging, what if you wonder what the story is? What if we actually ask the person? 

As for me, you can always ask. I'll do my best to answer. 

Besides, you already know where to find me. :)

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